Some of life’s greatest lessons come from walking through difficult seasons.
Over the past few years, we have experienced strained family relationships, silence where we hoped for conversation, and people choosing different paths than we ever imagined. I personally was working through strained relationships long before I met Kayleena, but there is a common thread we both share. We cannot control the decisions others make, whether they are family, friends, our children, siblings, parents, or people we once walked closely beside.
What we can control is how we respond and where we choose to keep our focus.
When we focus on the hurt or the silence, we can easily lose perspective. When our energy is spent trying to make people hear our side or proving ourselves, we often lose our peace. But when we keep God at the center, everything else eventually begins to find its proper place.
That doesn’t make the situation easier, especially at first. It simply reminds us that our identity is not found in the acceptance or rejection of other people. It is found in Christ. We cannot measure the value of our lives by how others choose to treat us, especially when we are striving to live with love, integrity, and faith. Their perspective, or even their agreement with our decisions, cannot become the standard by which we judge ourselves. That is especially true when there has been little or no desire to understand where we are or how God has been working in our lives.
We still pray for reconciliation wherever God allows it. We still hope for healing in broken relationships. But we are learning that our joy cannot depend on outcomes we cannot control. It also requires more than just one person or side seeking to understand or to accept the other person’s life choices.
Keeping God first has changed the way we see our circumstances. It has taught us gratitude instead of bitterness, hope instead of despair, and peace instead of constant striving. That doesn’t mean we never struggle. Some days are easier than others. We are human, and there are times when our emotions try to overpower our thoughts. In those moments, we remind ourselves to return our focus to Christ instead of our circumstances.
Perhaps that has been the greatest lesson of all. People may come and go. Relationships may change. Answers may never arrive. But God remains faithful through every season.
Trust that God will guide your steps, and give yourself grace when you find yourself trying to carry burdens that were never yours to carry. His faithfulness has never depended on the choices of others.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5–6